Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize