that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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