I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
