I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Randomize
