Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
