i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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