Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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