so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
