sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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