I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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