that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
