We should be called the Road Head Warriors
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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