i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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