I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
