is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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