My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
