Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
