you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
