Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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