Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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