Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
