That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
