AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
