Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
