Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
