he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
