discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
