they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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