im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I believe in your delicious
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
