His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
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