is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
