I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Even my vagina gasped.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
