oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
