38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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