She said her name was "party"
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
