This dress was meant to end up on your floor
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
