I wannas sexs uuuuu
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize