So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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