i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
