I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Oh god it's open bar.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
