There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
