I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
