why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
