the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
50% drunk capacity currently
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
