just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
