yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
