I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
