I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Such a big mess for such a small penis
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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