He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
