Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
The power of my boobs compel you
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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